The Club Integra FUNNY STUFF Thread

MoJoJoJo

Banned
what happen to the jokes? i'm so popular now :thumbs up everybody is always thinking of me in every post. i have bitches on CI Woot Woot :thumbs up
 

G3GirL

UUUHHHH-OOOOHHHHHHH...!!!
I tweaked this joke a bit...for your entertainment..

A teacher at a nursery school for retarded children says to her class, "Who can use the word 'Definitely' in a sentence?"

First a little girl says "The sky is definitely blue"
The teacher says, "Sorry, Eviloliv3, but the sky can be gray, or orange. Who else can use it in a sentence?"

A little boy then got up and said, "Trees are definitely green!"
Again, the teacher says, "Sorry, teg9five, but in the autumn, the trees are brown."

Another student from the back of the class raised his hand and asked the teacher, "Do farts have lumps?"

The teacher looked at him and said "MOJO! No, ofcoure not! But that's not really a question you want to ask in class discussion."

and Mojo says, "OK...then I DEFINITELY shit my pants..."

Thank you, thank you, save your applause. I'm going out. The end
 

MoJoJoJo

Banned
Hahahaha thats not bad. made me laugh. how long did it take u to think of that trinh? hehe i'm proud of u :thumbs up but seriously that was pretty good
 

TegSox

Super Duper Moderator
What's the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator?

The fridge doesn't fart when you take the meat out.
 

G3GirL

UUUHHHH-OOOOHHHHHHH...!!!
Construction worker on the 5th floor of a building needed a handsaw. So he spots another worker on the ground floor and yells down to him, but he can't hear him. So the worker on the 5th floor tries sign language.

He pointed to his eye meaning "I", pointed to his knee meaning "need", then moved his hand back and forth in a hand saw motion. The man on the ground floor nods his head, pulls down his pants, whips out his chop and starts masturbating.

The worker on 5th floor gets so pissed off he runs down to the ground floor and says, "What the fuck is your problem!!! I said I needed a hand saw!".

The other guy says, "I knew that! I was just trying to tell you - I'm coming!"
 

G3GirL

UUUHHHH-OOOOHHHHHHH...!!!
alright im buzzed. this is the last one for tonight. my eyes feel like they'e on fire and my contacts are making my eyes dry.

A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this...

'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.'

She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away."

So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?"

Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn't I?"

LOL let a guy like THAT ring my fucking doorbell...shit...it'd be on..
 

speedin

The Transporter
teg9five said:
...someones a horny drunk... :scurred:
Click to expand...
indeed.
yea she is. hahaha.

why does mojo like mcdonnalds hamburgers?
because they stick a 40 year old piece of meat in a 8 year old bun.
 

teg9five

a.k.a. crabs!
speedin said:
why does mojo like mcdonnalds hamburgers?
because they stick a 40 year old piece of meat in a 8 year old bun.
Click to expand...
hahahahahahahahaha i love it! im gonna use that one by the end of the week lol
 

g3teg97

Super Moderator
Three rednecks are working on a skyscraper: Steve, Bruce, and Jed. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, "Someone should go and tell his wife." Jed says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff—I'll do it." Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser. Bruce says, "Where did you get that, Jed?" "Steve's wife gave it to me," Jed replies. "That's unbelievable. You told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?" "Well, not exactly," Jed says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Steve's widow.'" She said, "No, I'm not a widow." And I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are."
 
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